“And now, as ye are desirous to come into the fold of God, and to be called his people, and are willing to bear one another’s burdens, that they may be light; yea, and are willing to mourn with those that mourn; yea, and comfort those that stand in need of comfort, and to stand as witnesses of God at all times and in all things, and in all places that ye may be in, even until death, that ye may be redeemed of God, and be numbered with those of the first resurrection, that ye may have eternal life” (Mosiah 18:8-9). These verses give us a pattern in all of the different ways that we can help and serve and love those who may be struggling. We bear one another’s burdens when we jump in and try to help fix their problems. This is often the right thing to do, but not always. Sometimes someone shares their burden with us not because they need or want us to help them carry it, but just so that they can have their experience validated and receive comfort from someone who is truly listening to their problems without trying to fix them. When we comfort those that stand in need of comfort, we help them to embrace their own strength and give them the confidence and determination to bear their burdens on their own two feet. But sometimes those we love are so laden down with suffering and grief that there is no quick fix and no right combination of words that can bring them comfort. Anything we say will ring hollow or out of touch or condescending. When they don't want or need our comfort, all we can do is mourn with them and silently share their grief in our own limited way. They may be too overwhelmed in the moment to notice or appreciate our efforts, but they will remember how we chose to simply mourn with them without trying to comfort them or fix their problem. And finally, sometimes we can't bear their burdens or mourn with them or comfort them or be near them in any way. Maybe they're a continent away or in prison or the ICU or they or we have done or said things that at the present time are impossible to fix or take back. At these times, when we cannot be physically near them, we can pray for them with all of the energy of our souls and stand as witnesses of God as He works His mighty miracles according to our faith to bring us back together so that we may serve and love them in more immediate and intimate ways. None of these approaches of bearing burdens or comforting or mourning or simply standing as a witness is more or less worthy or effective than another. All have their appropriate times and places. As we draw closer to the Savior and become more attuned to the whispered promptings of the Spirit, we will get better at knowing when each approach is the most appropriate and we will greatly increase the impact of our service to each other as we give each other the exact right help for each situation.
